They're not our words, the title is taken from Michael Schumacher's comments on qualifying at Saturday's FIA press conference. “For us too, it is not that interesting. We just sit around and wait.”

The derision being heaped upon the entertainment value of this year's opening F1 race was assuredly not the fault of Ferrari. During the winter months the currently best team in the world had simply got on with doing a good job even better.

Neither was it really the fault of the other grandee teams - the Williams and the McLarens, because they too had been working diligently to improve the excellent packages with which they exited the 2003 season.

The problems surely lie with the increasingly desperate efforts by the rule-makers to try to spice up the show. Each step towards creating artificiality and moving away from simple speed has served to leave the audiences more and more confused as to what the heck is going on. When did we last see a fastest race lap quicker than qualifying pole? How do you explain that qualifying is no longer a flat out blast but an exercise in engine conservation?

The one engine per weekend rule was introduced as a cost-cutting measure but none of the engine manufacturers have ever confirmed whether this is the case. The huge gap in funding between the front and the back of the grid has become even more noticeable, with the rear half being propped up by a succession of pay drivers unfamiliar to anyone but the most hardened follower of lesser formulae.

The new qualifying format, with the second session immediately following the first, will need revision. Because of the secrecy surrounding fuel loads it was impossible to gauge a good from an indifferent performance. The cars looked like brightly coloured flies buzzing round a track, one at a time, for two whole hours. If you want to watch GOOD single car action it's better to attend a round of the British Hill Climb Championship. It's also a lot cheaper.

Ferraris' domination extended throughout the practice and qualifying sessions, with the two cars being half a second quicker than Montoya's Williams and Button's BAR, who recorded identical times down to three places of decimals. Alonso in the Renault and Webber in the Jaguar surprised no-one with their fifth and sixth positions on the grid and BAR new boy, Takuma Sato, underlined the team's improvement with a solid seventh. The McLarens were the biggest flops, with Kimi down in tenth and DC nowhere in 12th.

The race itself was a pure Ferrari demonstration. Schuey and Rubens set off in almost leisurely fashion and never lost the lead, even during their three pit stops. Behind them Alonso was about the only one who put in a clean and tidy run but simply lacked the pace of the Ferraris. Aprés race wisdom has it that the Bridgestones were enjoying the cooler temperatures more than the much-vaunted Michelins. The next GP at Malaysia, where it is likely to be hot, may bring a different story.

Montoya was hustled into making a mistake at the first corner by the quicker-starting Alonso and then had two troubled pit stops to finally finish fifth. His team-mate Ralf had a quieter afternoon but was in acute danger of being lapped towards the end by his brother on his way to claiming an unspectacular fourth place. The McLarens disappointed hugely. Raikkonen retired on lap 10 when his Ilmor engine seized and DC finished in a lapped 8th place. So much for Ron questioning Michael Schumacher's motivation to win then.....

There is now a two week gap to the next race at the wonderful Sepang circuit in Malaysia. It is probably far too early to draw any quick conclusions from the Australian race but we can only fervently hope that the show will get better. If not then maybe it will be time to introduce some novel ideas, like one hour free-for-all qualifying, blindingly fast low fuel runs, no parc fermé and all the other things that we look so longingly back on.

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